i used to hide underneath the bed. where it was all dusty. i will squeeze myself in between the floor and the bed amongst piles of boxes that i squeeze below my bed.

i'd imagine i disappear from this life and into another. escape from the harsh reality of life to a different world where there was no worries. no subject of anger. no sadness. only calamity. something that i always hope and come to wish.

my mum will call for me and i will stay silent, not answering her calls. she figured i'm hiding somewhere. i needed to run away from it all. i had no other exit. just one. pretend to be invisible.

i've never dreamt and clearly disapproved of thoughts on ending one life. i may be a pessimist but i object to taking one life just because of one trouble that can't be handled wisely. this is what we call life. always full of trials and tribulation. the objective of our existence here on earth is to make full use of our strength and energy. pass through hardships. triumph over fears. get pass difficulties.

now, i don't run away anymore. i don't hide below my bed no more. i face my fears. i handle them myself. they are in fact, my own. but i do wish i was invisible at times. just mere minutes to get a sense of tranquility. to get away to another place.