how does it feel to lose all ability to storytell what you feel? your opinions aren't there anymore to share. you're not angry as you used to be. you're content now. sometimes it makes me want to puke just thinking about it. why are you happier? is it supposed to be good? then why are you feeling out of place? like a fish out of it's tank. lifeless.

that's how i feel everytime i take a look at this diary of mine. reading past entries puts a smile on my face. recalling readers that used to comment on my thoughts and hearing their views makes me warm inside. it's the feeling i get everytime i get a response from anyone regarding a topic and after sharing my views. i miss those moments when i always had something to say.

what went wrong? i realise i was an angry individual wanting people to hear what i have to say. now i'm just contented. it sucks big time. i'm unable to write like i used to. and no it isn't writer's block or anything like that shit.

i get pissed when nowadays people's comment range from 'great writtings but short' or 'beautiful' or something like that. it used to be others had things to say to me. what they think in return. that's what fulfill the art of writing. when you communicate and you think. you realise how human mechanics work. how others think and how it differ.

even my dreams of becoming a journalist and a writer has since fade. i'm not sure why. it's troubling me to the core. i feel like i've been stripped off my passion. i must admit that i'm happier nowadays. surrounded by wonderful people. but what about my passion?

if it perishes, i'll die with it.